el fin

May the road rise up to meet you.
May the wind be always at your back.
May the sun shine warm upon your face;
the rains fall soft upon your fields and until we meet again,
may God hold you in the palm of His hand.

and then it hit me...

I have come to realize that people around the world are essentially the same. Granted we live different lives, have different traditions and may dress differently. So sometimes it's hard for me to really grasp that I am outside of my 'home' country. The past two summers, I have spent time in the beautiful countries of Ukraine and Hungary. I remember feeling comfortable the first time I went, but last summer I remember a distinct moment where everything felt normal. I no longer noticed the little differences. This place looked and felt as normal and comfortable as when I would drive down my street in Iowa. It was a moment that I will always remember. I can't wait to go back. Booking my ticket is the first thing on my "to-do" list.

I don't know what happened this time, but I spent the first few weeks here so out of my comfort zone. Everything was hard. I reacted in ways unlike myself and I didn't feel "at home" here. Then student teaching picked up and things got busy. I slowly started forgetting that I felt uncomfortable because I was so wrapped up in the moment. There was stuff to do and I would come home exhausted every night and go to bed. There was no time to think. This week, I have only been teaching half time and I have allowed myself the time to think. Think about life. Think about Nicaragua. Think about students. Think about myself. And then it hit me. I have little more then a week here. A week from Monday I will be back in the States. The thought filled me with sorrow and a little bit of regret (not to mention, I stopped breathing for a few seconds when I realized it). I'm not ready to go back! Somewhere in the hustle and bustle of life stuff became "normal"- I adjusted and people turned from teachers/principals/co-workers into friends. I can't tell you the specific moment, but it happened and that's what matters. This place has become like another home to me, and I'm not ready to leave it. I have learned so much, shed so many tears and spent so many frustrating nights here- but I have also laughed, giggled and felt so much joy that it is hard to imagine. Nicaragua, I WILL miss you.

And now, I am sitting in the back of my classroom trying not to cry...so I should stop writing:)

voices from heaven

I walked in today on the first grade practicing for chapel. 20 little voices were praising our Lord and Savior. I about cried. In case you need a reminder of Who we serve, here is the song they were singing....

Happy (almost) Friday everyone! I'm bringing chocolate to my classes tomorrow to celebrate:)

I don't know/No se/Nem tudom/Je ne sais pas...

Okay, so I have a little confession to make- I had a hard time adjusting to life here for the first few weeks. It was a struggle and I still have mixed feelings about Nicaragua. Please hear me out- I love love LOVE NCA. I have been so blessed and I think Nicaragua is a beautiful country. But I have spent the past few weeks trying to picture myself here more then two months and I haven't been able to do it...until today.

One of the classes I teach is High School ESL. There are two girls in it and I love spending time with them and learning about their lives. It is a high light in my day. They are curious about me as well and have spent the last few days asking questions about my life, my family and how I like Nicaragua. Today, one of the girls asked me how long I was going to be here for. I told her until the end of the month. "Where will you go after that?" "Iowa." "Oh, then when do WE get you back?" I froze. She looked up at me, her eyes full of hope. I couldn't simply say "never" and leave it at that...so I mumbled something like "Well, I'm not sure if this is where God wants me." (what a dumb answer...I would have never bought such baloney when I was in high school)It didn't phase this girl, she immediately launched into an explanation of everyone she knew who said that...and then stayed. The funny thing, is that two hours ago I received an email asking for applications because most of the elementary is leaving next year. That email immediately flashed before my mind. I quickly pushed it out...I don't want to be here for more then two months. I miss my family, I miss Ukraine and I need money!

Fast forward two hours. I mentioned the above conversation to my co-operating teacher. Her response- "You need to be praying about that! There are so many job openings for next year!" Not what I was expecting. All I can say is that- Nicaragua- you are growing on me...God's in control of the rest and I trusting that He will let me know one way or another...

5:30am comes very early...

I am just about ready to go to bed, but I just thought I'd send a little update since it's been a little while. This week went well. I took over two more classes(kindergarten and second grade) and I had a blast with both of them. This week, Middle school and High school are on the list and it is also my week of "full control". It should go fine<- at least I am telling myself that. I am planned, approved and most everything is copied off. Bring. it. on. The good news is that middle/high school follow the same schedule and Tues/Thursday are homework days- so I only had to plan for three more days. It still was a little more work then I was expecting and I am left wondering how teachers have time for much else besides school!! But then I remember that I am still writing out full lesson plans- ie ones I would turn in. So that takes a little more time:)
But anyways, I am super excited for stuff I have planned this week:) The first graders are studying butterflies and the second graders are studying quilts! How fun! I had a little too much fun planning for this week I think. Hopefully they will enjoy it! Goodnight everyone! 5:30 am comes verrrrry early.

The Adventure continues...

I experienced my first earthquake today. 5.1 magnitude. Quite the adventure. Needless to say, I really did not know what was happening until it was almost over. I was so scared I was frozen in my seat. "Proper" earthquake safety says to get under something- like a desk. I spent most of the earthquake running around the room trying to find a desk. I then spent the last 15 seconds of it or so trying not to throw up- I was quite nervous. Give me a tornado any day over that! It also didn't help that as we were walking back into the school (leaving the building is the second step in earthquake safety) my cooperating teacher got quite close to my ear without me seeing her and exclaimed "Well that's something to write home about". Good thing God made skin so tight, because I jumped so fast that- if skin was looser- it would have not gone with me. Ohh, what an adventure!

I thought I would take this time to reflect on my last two-ish weeks here and everything I have learned so far. One thing I always appreciate about travelling is that you learn so much about yourself and life by doing it.

So here are my life lessons/what God has shown me through coming to Nicaragua(the two are intermixed, so bear with me here)-

1. After a long, hot and dusty day, a COLD shower is the most amazing feeling.

2. God knew what He was doing when he placed me at NCA. Student teaching is stressful and I have only been worrying about it since sophomore year. Trust me when I say- God saw the big picture with this whole thing. *there is a whole lot more I could say about this, but it's not internet appropriate. More like, let's sit down over a cup of coffee and we'll talk...God never ceases to amaze me.

3. "There is something about this country that makes you go to bed early and get up early." For the past two weeks, I have been up by 5:30 am. Morning person much? I think so...

4. I have found that my calling to be a teacher is not something I should be worrying about at 5:30 in the morning. Or at 6:30 in the morning. Because for the past week, those times have been the times when I am least likely to feel "called" to do anything except go back to bed. I just need to trust that the "re-affirmation" will be coming later in the day...Usually at about 9:35am when I go pick up my little first graders.

5. Geckos are gross. In cages they are fine. Running around my shower, not so fine.

6. Don't eat the lettuce. If you do, it will take two weeks to feel normal again.

7. I should have dyed my hair brown...it would eliminate a lot of problems.

8. Running sprints/running in general helps me organize my thoughts.

9. Tortillas- if left for more then two days- turn into a pile of mush.

10. If you think apartment living is noisy at Dordt, I can hear everything my neighbors, and their neighbors, and THEIR neighbors do at all times of the day.

11. I never knew my hair was so...curly.

12. Singing Spanish praise songs at 7am on a Friday is the best way to end a busy week.

13. I am seriously rethinking some major things about my life. ie. where I want to be next year. I am anxiously awaiting God's direction.

14. God places people and places in your life for a reason. Often times, i don't even know my own wounds until I am in a place of healing for them. People are so real down here. There is no beating around the bush or excuses made for with-holding parts of their lives. They are simply who God created them to be and accept who other people were created to be. And it's wonderfully refreshing.

15. and last but not least- Coke is amazing outside of the States.

There you go. So little things I have learned so far and some big life lessons God is working on teaching me. I just have to keep reminding myself that this side of Heaven, I am a work in progress. The destination makes this worth it:)
Have a marvelous Friday everyone!

A little insight into life in Nicaragua...

This morning, one of the couples at the school announced that they had been robbed-like "hole punched in fence, broken into, house completely ransacked, kids' Christmas toys stolen" kind of robbed. The couple themselves were doing okay with it, but their kids were feeling quite violated and vulnerable. I can totally understand why. This incident spawned quite the interesting conversation in 7th grade homeroom this morning. The boys had been reading a story about how they should not store up treasures on this earth "where moth and rust destroy or where theives break in a steal". All the boys had heard what had happened to the other family and they were all eager to share their own stories of being robbed. It amazed me because EVERY SINGLE HAND WENT UP! Everyone had a story to share. "My friend was robbed last week!" "Thieves took my Playstation." "I was robbed at gun point and they took my backpack." Robbed at GUNPOINT. It blew my mind. These kids are in seventh grade. SEVENTH! And already this is what they have experienced. My teacher's words after that little conversation were "Everyone has had an experience with it." Even her. (She shared her story with me after class). Here I am, a little blond haired, blue eyed girl from Iowa who has spent the last three/four years not locking my door. Granted, I am usually the one pushing for it to be locked but sometimes certain people can't remember their key...:)...so the door stays unlocked. The differences between the two worlds just blows my mind sometimes. I doubt this will be the last time I am completely shocked my something, it is most likely the first incident in many. It just never ceases to amaze me how easy my life has been.